A letter to my sixteen year old self

As tagged by papareboy

I'm a Bitch!

I m a bitch
Cos I don’t care how you feel
I m a bitch
When I make out with your friend
I m a bitch
And I like how I feel
I m a bitch
But at least I m no whore

I m a bitch
When I ruin your game
I m a bitch
Cos I lied to your face
I m a bitch
cos I’ve forgotten your name

I m a bitch
To your mother
I m a bitch
To your sister
I m a bitch
To your brother
But I aint a bitch
to your daddy

So sing it to me
Like you used to
B-I-T-C-H !
Hey!

What lies beneath a six star hangover..

Version Z

It’s like that black eyed pea’s song! “Tonight’s gonna be a good night”.
I kept singing that over and over in my head. Today was the day of our carefully planned ladies night. I can’t believe we finally made time for this.
It’s going to be awesome! I looked at myself in the mirror. The dress was just great! Thank sweet baby Jesus I wore a dress tonight because everyone else was in jeans.
Oh wait.. looks like R is also in a dress.
Oh cow dung!!
Hmm.. it doesn’t matter. As long as tonight’s gonna be a good night.

We were staying over at N’s place. We always stay over at someone’s place after a night out. Makes it easy to transport the disabled drunkards. hahah!

We cramped ourselves into a cab and headed off to Inn on the Green.
Had the usual fish and chips and then had a round of tequila. The clinking of shot glasses made my head buzz with excitement.
Then came the Bacardi.
Once that was done we whizzed off to the new club at Galadari.
N knew someone at the club so we got a table.
And then the drinks came.
S and R were dancing all night and I smiled to myself thinking “they all look so happy .. and drunk”
We took a couple of pictures. At least I remember posing for them.
Then they played our favorite song and we all danced , screaming. That’s when I noticed R flirting with some guy and N picking a fight with a stranger.
S was talking to her boyfriend G , who turned up at our ladies night.
Why do boys do that?
I speed dialed biz. He should be able to keep me company til-
I checked my watch.
- Oh well what do you know.. its 3.30 am already.
I cut off the line. He couldn’t hear me anyway. It was way too noisy in here.

I watched R and N wobble their way out of the club. I think they mentioned something about the ladies room.
“oh.. ok” I mouthed.
After a few minutes ( I swear to god it only seemed like 10 minutes ) the guy R was flirting with came back and was trying to say something.
Apparently the girls were in the ladies room for way too long.
I went to the ladies room and noticed that one cubicle was occupied.
R was out grooming herself, so obviously N was inside.
“she’s in right?” I asked finger combing my hair looking at R’s reflection in the wide glass mirror.
“Yeah” she drawled.
“It’s been a while hasn’t it?”
R turned to look at me.
“N!” we both cried in unison.
“you ok?”
We heard a gurgle and some blabs.
“is.. she puking?” R asked.
“N.. are you ok?” I asked again.
“I just puked.. all over my new jeans. its ruined.. I can’t go home like this.”
R and I exchanged looks.
“It’s ok “ I sighed . “We’ll wash your jeans ok.. just come out”
What a drama queen I thought wearily.
Then there was an awkward silence.
“do you wanna take a bathroom pic?” R asked smiling.
The next thing I knew I was posing for pics with R , giggling.
Then two girls walked in.
And that’s when we heard a “thud”
“N “we both screamed again as the two girls stared at us in surprise.
We kept pounding on the door, but no response.
“my friend.. she’s inside the loo and she won’t open the door” I panicked.
One girl was bold enough to climb through the cubicle to N’s cubicle and unlock the door.
And then what I saw will scar me for the rest of my life.
N with her pants down on the floor.. next to a pool of vomit.
There were stains all over her. She was damn right about her jeans.
It was disgusting.
R was too shocked to say anything, she was wobbling around.

“Too many tequilas?” one girl questioned.
I nodded.

“That explains it”

We pulled up her jeans and carried her out , to the hotel lobby.
Damn this girl was heavy.
Then she puked all over the couch.. and on the floor. S walked right in to the scene and started throwing up.
What is with all the puking?

“Let’s just go home” R wailed. None of us could carry N ,so S’s boyfriend lifted her up.
And her jeans slithered down causing a stir at the hotel lobby.
Right at that moment I just wanted to die.
I quickly pulled them up and covered her exposed buttocks.
“Let’s move!” I was practically screaming.
Once we got into the cab I was so relived and thankful that we were on our way home.
But the night wasn’t over yet. even though the day had just begun.. or whatever.
That was just the drunk in me talking.
N starts to choke.. (on her own puke) and turns over to me and throws up on my arm.
I screamed so loud I swear the whole world stopped spinning for a second.
My designer dress.
Ruined.
We opened the car door and let her throw up, but she passed out again.
As we were about to leave, R begins to puke. And we took a whole ten years to get over it.

I was so tired of cleaning up the puke off me, and just as we thought we are home sweet home we get pulled over by cops.
We took out our ID’s to pass out to the cops and guess who pukes all over the cop stand?
S.
The cops are so grossed out , they ask us to leave.
So we hopped back in and drove away.. in fear.
What are we gonna tell N’s parents?!
As the final destination approached we conjured up a whacky story that N had one glass of Vodka for the first time and passed out.
Right.
Oh and her parents knew we were shitting.
With her dad shouting at us being drunk at 5am, recognizing the signs I assumed.
“ are you sure , she’s not dead?” grandma panicked.
“y-yes” I managed to stammer.
N’s mum tried the whole lime thing , but that only made her puke some more.
Once she passed out again, we all had a nice wash and hit the bed.
.. and that’s when I knocked out.

The Power Cut

I woke up to a bunch of awful snores last night also to discover that my body was dripping with sweat.
It was the beginning of a long night.
I really don’t know how some people could sleep through it because the whole house was vibrating with all kinds of noisy snoring.
I fanned myself with some wafer thin paper I found on the bed and logged on to Face book to find out if anyone else was sharing my misery.

Of course a few bloggers had complained of their sleepless nights and updated their statuses making it easier to keep myself entertained through the night,
Ahamed had a problem with eating a chocolate choc chip, chocolate ripple and chocolate biscuit pudding in a mug. In the dark.
I feel for you Ahamed. Such a delicious treat should be eaten while you can also enjoy looking at it. Eating the damned thing ,blindly is a curse.

My cousin complained of putting make up on, in the dark while getting ready for a flight. I cannot imagine the frustration she would have been going through.
And then after taking ages to perfect the make up, the flight gets cancelled. The life of a stewardess is just awful with no electricity on.

What is this world coming to? Tsk tsk

ANYWAYS.. I hope the power is back on in most areas. I didn’t even iron my office uniform and came to work looking like I’d slept in last night’s clothes.
Who gives a shit anyway. If my boss wants to complain.. let her! She sure loves to bitch about things that don’t make much sense anyway!

Did I tell you about the time she got all peeved about a man who groped her while talking to her? Well, she groped the exact same man when he came to see her yesterday.
Haven’t you heard that Frustration in your late forty’s is a common thing that occurs in women who are single?

Denial isn’t going to get you anywhere , you old hag.

Oh well, I just wanted to bitch a bit about that as well.
Have a nice day you’ll!
xoxo

Bloggers I have met !

I was tagged by st.fallen to mention the bloggers I have met ! This may surprise you guys.. but Jerry was the first blogger I met.
I think this was about two years ago at some awkward forum meet up . He was very quiet and didn’t say much.. but then again so was I. Its hard to evaluate people with all the silence. ...

And he was a bit skinny back then as well. Now he is just a balloon waiting to pop. Just kidding.
Jerry is a complete stud.

The second blogger I met was st.fallen. we started communicating to each other through our respective blogs, constantly commenting on each other’s posts, chatting on msn, etc.
Then when I finally met him, he was just a little boy full of energy ... and creative ideas waiting to pop out. He is like the brother I never had and always wanted. Talented , straightforward and very intelligent.
There were times he sang to me, read me scripts off the holy Quran , just to help me to deal with the dark times. I love you kiddo. You helped me get through some pretty dark times by being there for me when I had no one.

The next blogger I met was papare boy! He was a sweet thing who helped me get some DVDs I 've been wanting to purchase for a while. I was pretty nervous about meeting papare boy and I had been putting off the meeting for weeks, but then when we finally did meet ( at some bookfair) and it wasn’t so awkward as I had expected it to be. Except for the time we said our goodbyes and I messed up the whole hand gesture thing.

The last blogger I met was , someone whom I have gotten to know so much by just reading her beautiful blog. And the meeting was spontaneous and unplanned! My cousin asked me if I wanted to go on a trip with her friends and I had agreed. And guess who turned up ? Lady D!

I couldn’t help looking at her and thinking.. hmm.. I know her!! But then lady D bonked me over my confused head and said “ yo? Its me home girl! Your lady D”
AND then we hit it off from there even though the food really really.. really sucked at the hotel we stayed at.

But I did get to share a drink with her and it was good. We should chill more often lady D!


I gotta say all you bloggers are just awesome. And I enjoy reading your blogs very much. I have to really thank ST.FALLEN for tagging me and helping me to re kindle the memories .

Love you guys
xoxo

Heroes season 5

.. I really don't know why I watch heroes anymore. I mean why does every single person have a "special ability"? ..

and yes I had nothing to write about .. so I came up with this one liner.

LAME!!!

I know!! now shoot me.

My Spine...

.... hurts

Guess who..

...I am?

I am a natural brunette but I prefer to be blond.

I wear drag queenish make up.

I am also rumoured to be a whore because I like fucking older men.

I have an ( really X 25 ) annoying accent when I speak in Sinhalese.

So who am I?